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心理专家:“吞钉男”系因渴求关注致人格异化--亲稳舆论引导监测室
2012-07-19
“吞钉男”为何总爱编故事? “Swallowed nail male”Why total love stories?
两月内在苏浙四地四次吞钉,明明自己吞钉却总是声称被迫,甚至在11岁的时候便诬陷父亲给自己投毒……本报连续报道的“吞钉男”查澄华的故事令许多读者觉得匪夷所思,而心理专家却表示,查澄华自幼的异常行为也许只是为了吸引父母的关注,但长此不加控制,最终演变成了人格异化。
Within two to four times four su zhejiang swallow nail,Plain but was always claim that forced to swallow,Even in the age of 11 and framed a father to his poisoning......This continuous reports“Swallowed nail male”Check ChengHua story to many readers feel inconceivable,But psychological expert has said,Check ChengHua was unusual behavior may be in order to attract the attention of parents,But the long not controlled,Eventually evolved into a personality alienation。
关注查澄华的成长轨迹,4岁时的父母离异无法回避,而从记者采访的情况来看,查澄华起初是被判给母亲抚养的,而后因为母亲经济困难回到父亲身边。南京12355青少年服务台心理咨询师文清接受采访时说,与成年人甚至学龄期的孩子不同,年幼孩子的满足感更多的是来源于父母,查澄华4岁时便遭遇父母离异,当父母因为离异,因为生计而忽略他时,作为一个孩童,会本能想吸引父母的关注。
Focus on the growth of ChengHua check track,Age 4 parents divorced can avoid,And reporters from the situation,Check ChengHua at first sentenced to mother raised,And then because mother difficult economic return to his father's side。Nanjing 12355 teenagers desk counseling ShiWenQing an interview,Even school-age children and adults are different,Young children's satisfaction is more from their parents,Check ChengHua age 4 will encounter parents divorced,When parents for divorce,For a living and ignore him,As a child,Will instinctively want to attract the attention of parents。
正常的行为自然不会吸引父母的眼光。这大概也印证了查澄华在11岁时谎称遭到父亲“投毒”。撒谎不是目的,得到关注才是初衷。也许刚开始查澄华的确是这么想的,但这种行为不受控制地发展,最终导致的便是人格异化。
Normal behavior will not attract the eye of natural parents。This is probably meant check ChengHua at age 11 that was his father“poisoning”。Lie is not the purpose,Getting attention is the original intention。Maybe at the beginning of ChengHua check is indeed think so,But this kind of behavior is not controlled development,Eventually lead to alienation is personality。
查澄华的故事令人牵挂而揪心,但我们更需要知道,现实生活中应如何避免类似不幸的发生。文清给出了自己的忠告:结婚前充分选择,婚后,尤其是有了孩子以后就不要随心所欲。离婚不仅仅是两个人的感情问题,弱势而无辜的孩子需要保护,父母应当担起这份责任。今年上半年南京婚姻登记的相关数据显示,前6个月南京有10634对夫妻到婚姻登记处协议离婚,离婚平均年龄38.1岁,比去年提前了0.7岁。其中女性离婚的平均年龄是36.7岁,偏向年轻化。这也意味着,离婚时孩子的年龄也是偏小的。
Check ChengHua story is about and so concerned,But we also need to know,Real life should be how to avoid such calamity。Wen qing gave his advice:Before marriage fully choice,After marriage,Especially after the children don't follow one's inclinations。Divorce is not only two people's emotional problem,The weak and innocent children need protection,Parents should take on this responsibility。In the first half of this year the nanjing marriage registration of related data shows,The first six months of 10634 couples nanjing the marriage registration office divorce agreement,Divorce mean age, 38.1 years,By 0.7 years old than last year。The average age of the women of divorce is 36.7 years old,Turn to younger。It also means that,When the divorce the child's age is also slants little。
文清表示,即使夫妻两人真的无法继续共同生活下去,那么精力也不能完全被离婚时的对抗所牵扯,分配给孩子的注意力也不应该因为离婚而减少。夫妻双方必须要让孩子知道,即使父母间的感情出现了问题,但对自己的感情是没有变化的。离婚期间以及离婚后,千万不要冷落孩子,更不能让孩子感觉到自己被遗弃了。不要减少对孩子的关注,便是把对孩子的伤害降到最低。(记者 薛 玲)
Wen qing said,Even if the husband and wife really cannot continue to live,So energy can not be completely be divorce against the quarters,Assigned to the child's attention also should not because divorce and reduce。Both sides of husband and wife have to let the children know that,Even if the parents of a problem between feelings,But for their affection is no change。During the divorce and after divorce,Don't children left out in the cold,More must not let the children feel abandoned。Don't reduce to the child's attention,The child is to the damage to a minimum。(Reporter: ling)
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