前段时间，武汉理工大学学海心理咨询室老师雷五明在微博上“吐槽”“今晚又该我值班了，希望不要像上周那样来那么多人。今年，2012，好像来访的人特多。”

Some time ago,Wuhan university of science and technology studies the counseling teachers ray five Ming in micro blog"Vomit tank""Tonight again this I watch the,Hope don't like that last week to so many people.This year,2012,As the visitor manufacturer."

大学生们都找雷五明聊些什么？ The students all find ray five Ming talk about?

　　每年都在课堂上“教学生谈恋爱”的麻辣老师雷五明介绍，在前来咨询的学生中，有两成为情所困，与往年相比，今年前来咨询的纯感情的诉求增多，同时，男生感情受挫的比例逐渐增加。

Every year in the classroom"Teach students fall in love"The spicy teacher ray five Ming is introduced,In the students to come to consult,There are two be empathetic,Compared with previous years,This year to come to consult the pure emotional appeal more,At the same time,The boy feeling frustrated proportional increase gradually.

[调查]两成咨询者为情所伤　集中在大二大三 [investigation] twenty percent consultant for feeling that is wounded concentrated in the sophomore junior

　　记者在武汉理工大学和华中师范大学心理咨询室探访得知，两者每年接待的咨询学生约为2400人次和4000人次，其中情感咨询占20%，各有480人次和800人次。“大一学生最多的问题是学习适应、人际关系问题，大四集中在就业、考研等方面，大二大三的就去谈恋爱了。”雷五明说。

Reporter in the wuhan university of science and technology and central China normal university counseling that visit,Both received every year consulting students is about 2400 people and 4000 people,The emotional consultation accounted for 20%,All 480 passengers and 800 people."A freshman of the most serious problems is to learn to adapt to/Interpersonal relationship between,Senior focus on employment/One's deceased father grind, etc,Sophomore junior to them; and they fell in love."Ray five testified.

　　大三男生小王就是为情所伤者之一。

Big three boys wang is one of the wounded feelings.

　　大一时，他暗恋一校友，对方人缘很好，不管男生女生都愿意跟她一起玩。小王觉得自己长相和个人能力都很一般，一直不敢表白。大二时，暗恋的女生恋爱受伤，小王鼓起勇气去安慰她，看她哭，哄她笑，依然没表白，等到大二下学期，小王表白了，结果被婉拒不说，还遭到这个女生连番的冷言冷语。此后，只要小王在场，暗恋女生就会毫不留情面地拿话刺激他，经常让他下不来台。小王说，原本是好朋友，自从表白后，自己连走路几乎也要躲着她，他不明白原因是什么，并且从此再也不敢对其他女生表白。

A big,He has a crush on a alumni,The other is a people person,No matter boy girl are willing to play with her.Wang feel looks and individual ability is very general,Have been afraid to vindicate.sophomore,Like of girl love injury,Wang summon up courage to comfort her,See her cry,Coax her smile,Still did not express,Wait until the next semester sophomore,Wang told,The result is not decline,The girl still suffer many of the sarcastic comments.Since then,As long as wang present,Like the girl will not leave to take have words to stimulate him,Often let he doesn't go down table.Wang said,Originally are good friends,Since after the profession,His almost even walk also want to hide her,He did not understand the reason is what,And never do to other girls.

　　武汉理工大女生小李，也被爱情困扰了很久。她说，高中时，有个男生向自己表白，但目标却不是自己，而是借自己来接近好友，一气之下，她与那名男生掰了。进入大学后，两人又逐渐联系起来，一个月前，对方再次向她表白，但小李觉得他还是动机不纯。

Wuhan polytechnic girl xiao li,Was also love trouble for a long time.She said,High school,There is a boy to his profession,But the goal but not yourself,But borrow to close friends,In a pet,She and the schoolboy bye.After entering the university,Two people link and gradually,A month ago,Each other again to say to her,But xiao li think he or motivation not pure.

[分析]男生“受伤”多过女生，观念开放是主因 [analysis] boys"injury"More than girls,Open concept is the main reason

　　雷五明介绍，十年前，因感情困扰前来咨询的学生中，男女比例为1:3，现在则是1:1，“男生比女生更容易受伤”。

Thunder Ming introduces five,Ten years ago,Because of the feelings of the students in trouble to come to consult,The male to female ratio is 1:3,Now is 1:1,"Boys than girls more vulnerable to injury".

　　大四男生小徐来自农村，大三时，同系的一个师妹对他表示好感，于是两人恋爱了。两个月后，师妹突然以不合适为理由要求分手，这让小徐想不通，他找到心理咨询师，倾诉道：明明是她主动追的我，当我要对其负责时，她却提出分手。

Senior boys small xu from the countryside,Big three,With the system of a teacher younger sister told him he is good,Hence two people in love.After two months,Teacher younger sister suddenly to inappropriate for grounds for break up,It makes little xu think impassability,He found a counselor,Pouring way:Clearly is on her own initiative after me,When I want to its charge,She had put a break up.

　　雷五明说，虽然大部分年轻人的性观念里还有传统的保守色彩，但与十年前比已经有了巨大变化，一改过去女生硬性要求男生负责，如今男女平等，反而让想负责的男生不适应了。

Ray five testified,Although most young people's sexual idea and the traditional conservative colour,But ten years ago and is already there have been great changes,Change the past girl rigid requirements is responsible for the boy,Now the equality between men and women,Instead let wants to be in charge of boys don't adapt to the.

　　华中师范大学心理咨询室老师孙启武介绍，在情感咨询的学生中，大部分的诉求是“如何挽回爱情”。“我们只能从心理学角度，帮助梳理他在感情中的心理和行为，只能起到心理疏导作用。但大部分学生过来，是让我们帮忙追回女生。对此，我们无能为力。”

Central China normal university counseling teachers SunQiWu is introduced,In the emotions of the students in consultation,Most of the appeal is"How to restore love"."We can only from the psychology Angle,Help carding his feelings in the psychological and behavior,Can only play a psychological counseling effect.But most of the students come over,Let's help recover the girl.this,There is nothing that we can do."

[延伸]人际关系咨询量排第一 [extension] interpersonal consultation quantity row first

　　“去年心理咨询室的接访量有2400人次，我个人有大约200人次，最多的是人际关系处理不好，占了30%。”在武汉理工大学心理咨询室，做了19年大学生心理咨询师的雷五明说，在该室的案例中，大学生人际关系困扰、情感困扰和就业及职业规划困扰排在前三，总计占接待人次的70%。

"Last year the counseling JieFang a quantity to have 2400 people,Personally, I have about 200 people,Most is interpersonal is bad,Account for 30%."In the wuhan university of science and technology counseling,Do 19 year college students' psychological consultant ray five speaking plainly,In this room cases,College students' interpersonal relationship problems/Emotional problems and employment and career planning beset the top three,Reception, in total, account for 70% of the people.

　　雷五明介绍，随着80后、90后逐渐成为大学生主体，独生子女的家庭环境，造成了这一批学生极强的个性，在大学的集体生活中容易出现矛盾，造成人际关系困扰，特别是宿舍关系。他说，在宿舍里，甚至是晚上关灯的小事，也能引起情绪爆发，造成关系紧张。

Thunder Ming introduces five,With 80/After 90 gradually become college students' main body,The one-child family environment,Caused this batch of students strong personality,In the university of collective life is easy to appear the contradiction,Cause the interpersonal relationship problems,Especially the dormitory relations.He said,In the dorm,Even the little in the evening to turn off the lights,Also can cause feelings erupted,Cause tension.

　　来自黄冈的小胡，就因为处理不好宿舍关系，到大二的时候就两次调换宿舍。

From the huanggang moustaches,Because of processes is not good dormitory relations,To the big two exchange dormitory.

　　小胡习惯晚睡早起，室友们睡觉的时候，会嫌她的电脑屏幕打扰自己；室友们开卧谈会的时候，小胡则会“提醒”不要吵到自己；她早上起床洗漱，还在睡觉的室友又“抗议”她声响太大。半年下来，第一个宿舍的女生自动分成了两个阵营：室友们的活动，小胡从来不参与；小胡的一些倡议，也少有人响应。觉得自己被完全孤立，小胡要求辅导员给自己重新安排宿舍。结果，第二个宿舍已经形成的圈子和生活习惯，她更融入不了。

Small habit late to get up early,Roommates sleeping of time,Will think her computer screen to bother yourself;Roommates open will lie to talk when,Lane will"remind"Don't bother yourself;She morning wash gargle,Is still in bed roommate and"protest"She sound too big.Half a year down,The first dormitory girl automatic divided into two camps:My roommates activities,Small never participates in;Some of the initiative lane,Also someone less response.Think you are completely isolated,Small requirements counselor to reschedule the dormitory.The results,The second dormitory has been formed circle and living habits,She is not into.

　　一个月后，小胡再次要求辅导员重新安排宿舍，结果还是没有出现她渴望的“一团和气”。辅导员提醒她搞好宿舍关系时，她无奈地找到心理咨询老师哭诉遭遇。

After a month,Small again request counselor to arrange dormitory,Results or did not appear for her"YiTuanHeQi".Counselor remind her do a good job in the dormitory relations,She reluctantly find psychological counseling teachers SOB encounter.

　　“人际关系紧张，跟家庭环境有重大关系。”雷五明分析说，这些孩子在成长过程中，一般都是好几个大人宠爱他一人，逐渐形成了自我为中心的思维和行为习惯。大学的宿舍生活，是大学生人际关系发生的重要场所，如果自我中心太强烈，必然会造成与整个宿舍格格不入的结果。

"Interpersonal tension,With family environment have significant relationship."Ray five Ming analysis said,These children in the growth process,Are generally several adult dote on him a man,Gradually formed a self-centered thinking and behavior habits.University dormitory life,College students' interpersonal relationship is an important place to happen,If egocentric too intense,Will cause and the whole dormitory antipathetic results.

　　同样，在华中师范大学心理咨询室，去年大约4000人次的咨询中，人际关系问题的咨询量也是排在第一位，占30%。

The same,In the central China normal university counseling,Last year, about 4000 people in the consultation,The problem of the relationship between interpersonal consultation quantity is also existed in the first place,30%.

　　孙启武认为，除了家庭环境，学生们一直接受的教育也是造成人际交往问题的重要原因。他说，在进入大学之前，大多数孩子都是被要求“只管学习，不管其他”，很少学习如何与人打交道、处理宿舍关系，进入完全不一样的大学生活，不少大一、大二的学生适应不了，与身边人关系紧张。

SunQiWu think,In addition to family environment,The students have been accepted education is also causes the interpersonal problem important reason.He said,Before they entered the university,Most children are requirements"Just learning,Regardless of other",Seldom learn how to work with people/Processing dormitory relationship,Enter the completely different university life,Many freshman/The student of 2 is not adapted for,And beside the person's relation nervous.

　　在武汉理工大学和华中师范大学，就业及职业规划的咨询量排在第三位，占总数的15%到20%之间。“以前没有转专业，没有双学位辅修，没有那么多考研、考公务员，毕业之后干什么很简单。现在选择项多了，但不知道自己想要什么的人也越来越多。”孙启武说，曾经有个前来咨询的学生，成绩很优秀，可以保研继续深造，还收到了六七份公司的录用通知，但他又想考公务员，为此纠结到失眠。

In the wuhan university of science and technology and central China normal university,Employment and career planning consultation quantity is ranked third in the world,Accounts for between 15% to 20% of the total."Haven't turned professional,No double degree minor,Not so much one's deceased father grind/Take an examination of civil servants,After graduation to do is very simple.Now select the item,But I don't know what you want out of life more and more."WuShui ding,There was once a student to come to consult,Grades are excellent,Can protect research continues to pursue advanced studies,Also received a six or seven offer notice,But he and want to take an examination of civil servants,For this ravel to insomnia.

　　这名男生从小很少有机会选择自己的出路，一下子面临多种选择，他不知道该选哪个。保研的话，要错过手上六七份别人很羡慕的工作机会，而这几份工作机会里，又涉及到薪酬待遇、未来发展空间、工作地点的选择，即使选择最合适的工作机会，他又担心失去考公务员的机会。同时，他还怀疑自己的选择是否在内心里又被父母“安排”了。

The boys from rarely have the opportunity to choose their own way out,Suddenly faced with many choices,He didn't know what to choose which.Insurance research words,To miss the hands of six or seven others envy job opportunities,And this a few job opportunities,And involves the remuneration/The future development of space/Working location choice,Even if you choose the most suitable job opportunities,He worried about the loss of the opportunity to take an examination of civil servants.At the same time,He also doubt whether own choice, in the mind again by parents"arrangement"the.

　　雷五明说，就业的压力已经压到了大一、大二学生身上。以武汉理工大学为例，每年每个专业至少有七八个人转进或者转出，其中不少人是考虑未来的就业。另外，每个班至少有三分之一甚至一半的学生选择考研，还可以辅修双学位，学生不得不一次次做选择。“原本想转专业，又不确定转进的那个专业好不好，或者担心转进去又不满意；看身边人都考研，自己也想考，但不是发自内心，成绩还不是很好；选个双学位吧，又要考虑哪个专业好，是辅修本校还是到外校，各种纠结、困扰就来了。”

Ray five testified,The employment pressure has pressure to the freshman year/Sophomore student body.In wuhan university of technology as an example,Each year professional at least seven or eight others turn into or roll out,Many of the people is to consider the jobs of the future.In addition,Each class at least a third even half of the students choose one's deceased father grind,Can also minor double degree,After the students have to make a choice."Originally want to turn professional,And not sure turn into the professional is good,Or worry turn in and not satisfied;See side people one's deceased father grind,Oneself also want to take an examination of,But not from the heart,Results are not very good;Choose a double degree it,And to consider which major is good,The school is minor or finally,Various entanglements/Trouble will come."

[建议]对心理问题学生需要更重视 [recommendation] to psychological problem students need to pay more attention to

　　“高校自杀的学生里，有80%是因为心理问题。考研失败、找工作失利、感情受挫，这些表面上看到的事，只是偶然性的引线。”孙启武说，按照自杀率计算，武汉高校出现的学生自杀事件属于正常范围，这部分学生大多已经出现心理问题，高校应该提高对这部分学生的发现。

"University students in suicide,80% because of psychological problems.One's deceased father grind failure/Job loss/Emotional setback,These on the surface of things to see,Just accidental lead."WuShui ding,According to the suicide rate calculation,Wuhan university came the student suicides belong to the normal range,This part of the students are mostly has appeared psychological problems,Colleges should enhance this part of student's found.

　　在朋友们看来，大二女生小黄完全是一个正常人。性格算不上开朗，但开得起玩笑，所以她们经常以“小胖”的外号喊她，小黄也从来没有表示过反抗。但她为此已经困扰了一年多，实在憋不住，找到了学校心理咨询室。经过聊天才知道，她6岁的时候被寄养给叔父一家，11岁的时候，叔父家有了自己的孩子，又把她还给亲生父母。在叔父家生活了5年，即使回到父母身边，与家人的关系已经生疏，心里有事从来不跟他们说。

In my friends it seems,Sophomore girls yellow completely is a normal person.Character is not optimistic,But open the joke,So they often with"Xiao pang"Nickname shout to her,Yellow never expressed resistance.But she has trouble for more than a year,To urinate urgently,Find the school counseling.After chat just know,She is six years old of time is to foster a uncle,At the age of 11,Uncle's house have children of my own,And give her back to his natural parents.In uncle home life for five years,Even if returned to their parents around,Relationship with her family has been rusty,Heart have never told them.

　　寄养的经历，让她觉得自己被抛弃了两次；与父母、兄弟的关系疏远，让她觉得自己多余，没有安全感。她的内心很需要朋友，所以不敢对朋友起的外号抗议，但心里又很讨厌别人叫她“小胖”，这让她觉得自己很丑。找到心理咨询老师时，她坦言，自己觉得生活没意思。

Foster experience,Let her feel abandoned twice;And parents/The relationship between the brothers apart,Let her feel extra,insecurity.Her heart really need friends,So dare not to friends the nickname protest,But in the mind again hate it when people call her"Xiao pang",It made her feel ugly.Find the psychological counseling teachers,She said,Feel life is boring.

　　“心理问题分为几种类型，原因也有多种。一部分的类型外人看不出来，觉得他是正常人，一旦发作，后果很严重。”雷五明介绍，曾经轰动一时的马加爵，就存在着人格障碍方面的心理问题。他说，以武汉理工大为例，学校有近5万学生，每年开学会统一做心理普查，对分数异常的学生建立保密资料库，及时跟踪情况，一旦出现轻度心理问题，会及时介入，如果程度比较深，则会直接转入专业医院治疗。每年，出现严重情况，需要专业医生介入的有大约30人。

"Psychological problem is divided into several types,There are a variety of reasons.Part of the type outsiders look not to come out,Think he is normal,Once the attack,The consequence is very serious."Thunder Ming introduces five,Once a hit of ma3 jia jue2,There is personality disorder aspects of psychological problems.He said,Polytechnic in wuhan as an example,School has nearly five students,Every year to open unified do psychological census,To score abnormal students build security database,Timely follow up,Once appear, mild psychological problems,Will timely intervention,If degree is deep,Will directly to professional hospital for treatment.Every year,Severe situation,Need professional intervention about 30 people.

　　“按5万人基数算，比例很小。但是与一般性心理困扰不同，这一部分人的问题解决起来比较难，一旦产生后果，不管是对他们个人，或者其他人，都很严重。”雷五明说，虽然高校都设有心理咨询室，班级还有心理委员，但是不同的学校，心理咨询团队的工作效果也不同，高校需要重视起来，及时监控到可能出现严重心理问题的情况。

"According to the 50000 people is base,Proportion is very small.But general psychological problems with different,This part of the problem solving up more difficult,Once the consequences of,Whether to their personal,Or other people,Are very serious."Ray five testified,Although university have counseling,Class and psychological committee,But different schools,Psychological counseling team working effect is also different,The need to pay attention to it,Timely monitoring to may appear serious psychological problem situation.