来源： source：郑州晚报 Zhengzhou evening news

    14岁的大男孩     14 years old boy

　　每次出门 When you go out of

　　都穿4条内裤 All wear four pants

　　这是为什么？ This is why？

　　昨天，在郑州市未成年人健康成长指导中心，负责人刘磊给记者讲述这样一个案例：一位单亲妈妈因为经常抱怨“男人没一个好东西”，让14岁的儿子对自己男孩的身份很困惑，不想做男孩。记者 张华

yesterday，In zhengzhou city healthy growth of minors guidance center，Person in charge LiuLei to reporters about such a case：A single mother because often complain about“Men have no a good thing”，Let the 14-year-old son to his boy's identity is very confused，Don't want to do the boy。Reporter zhang hua

　　案例

case

　　14岁男孩一次穿4条内裤，“我要是个女孩该多好”

14 years old boy a wear four pants，“I want to be a girl should be much good”

　　刘磊说，上周六，一对母子来中心做咨询，男孩14岁，叫小强（化名），人高马大的，但很腼腆，问一句说一句。

LiuLei said，Last Saturday，A pair of mother and child to do consulting center，14 years old boy，Called jack Bauer（alias），RenGaoMaDa of，But very shy，Ask a word。

　　小强的妈妈很着急，因为这么大的孩子了，还跟妈妈睡一张床，只要不跟妈妈一起睡，就整夜整夜睡不着，连洗澡都要让妈妈给搓背。

Jack Bauer's mother was worried，For such a big child，Also a bed with my mother，As long as don't sleep together with my mother，Will all night to sleep all night，Even take a shower all want mom to rub back。

　　咨询师与小强交流发现，小强非常没有安全感，还很焦虑，而且对自己的性别很是困惑，虽然已经进入青春期，但是孩子内心里不想做男人，“想做像妈妈一样伟大的女人”。

Consultants and jack Bauer exchange found，Jack Bauer's very insecure，Is still very anxiety，But also to their gender is very confused，Although has entered into adolescence，But the child inside don't want to be a man，“Want to do like mother great woman”。

　　于是，小强给自己作了掩护：每次出门都穿4条内裤。

so，Jack Bauer give yourself a cover：Every time go out to all wear four pants。

　　是男儿身，但是心里却想做女人，小强开始变得有些抑郁和自卑，“我要是个女孩该多好”，人际交往也存在一些障碍，对性别的认知，像是八九岁的孩子，跟年龄有很大的差距。

Is man body，But the heart want to be a woman，Jack Bauer started to get some depression and inferiority，“I want to be a girl should be much good”，Interpersonal also exists some obstacles，The cognitive of gender，Like eight or nine years old children，There is a wide gap between with age。

根源 root

　　单亲妈妈教育儿子，“男人没一个好东西” Single mother education son，“Men have no a good thing”

　　“孩子妈妈很焦虑，压力大，一说到情感问题就很激动。”刘磊说，在孩子做咨询时，小强的妈妈主动找他倾诉，往椅子上一坐，两条腿不时地晃来晃去，手不由自主地抖。

“The child mother very worried，Pressure big，Say to the emotional problem is very excited。”LiuLei said，When the child do consultation，Jack Bauer's mother actively looking for his talk，Into the chair，Two legs dangling from every now and then，Shake hands spontaneously。

　　小强的妈妈有着不幸的婚姻，在怀孕时老公就有了外遇，拖到孩子一岁断奶时摊牌，最终在小强两岁时这个家彻底解散。此后，小强的爸爸一两年也跟孩子见不上一面。

Jack Bauer mother is unfortunate marriage，In pregnancy the husband had an affair，Until a year when children weaned showdown，Finally, in jack Bauer two years old this home completely dissolved。Since then，Jack Bauer's father one or two years with the child see not top side。

　　由于各种原因，在12年间，小强的妈妈最终也没有再组家庭，“男人没一个好东西”成为她的一种口头宣泄。

For various reasons，In 12 years，Jack Bauer's mother finally also does not have the restitution family，“Men have no a good thing”Be her a verbal catharsis。

　　从小没爸，小强的妈妈觉得很对不起孩子，只要孩子有要求，她都尽力答应。在孩子的眼里，“她是一个伟大的妈妈”。

Didn't dad from，Jack Bauer's mother felt very sorry children，As long as children have requirements，She try to promise。In the eyes of my children，“She is a great mother”。

　　刘磊和咨询师建议小强妈妈，一定要改善孩子的生活环境，竖立“我是一个男子汉”的概念，多带孩子跟男同事、男亲戚接触，建立起正常的男女认知，多参与一些男性热衷的例如足球、篮球运动等。

LiuLei and consultants suggest jack Bauer mother，Must improve the child's living environment，erect“I am a man”concept，Take the child with male colleagues、Male relatives contact，Establish normal men and women cognitive，Many participated in some men nuts such as football、Basketball sports。

　　援助

aid

　　“彩虹家园”免费援助单亲妈妈，下周六启动

“Rainbow home”Free aid single mother，Start next Saturday

　　郑州市未成年人健康成长指导中心自从5月份开展公益咨询以来，共接待了163个家庭，其中一半的家庭处于单亲状态或经历过暂时的单亲。这些单亲家庭的孩子一般出现的问题是逆反、早恋、性格孤僻，或者是攻击性强。

Zhengzhou healthy growth of minors guidance center since may carry out since public consultation，Received a total of 163 families，Half of them family in a single state or experienced temporary single parent。These the children of single-parent families generally appear problem is negative、Early love、Withdrawn character，Or is aggressive。

　　下周六（8月25日）将启动“彩虹家园”项目，凡是经历过单亲的、正处于单亲的妈妈都可以报名登记，参与沙龙时不需要缴纳任何费用。

Next Saturday（On August 25,）Will start“Rainbow home”project，Those who experienced the single parent、Are in a single mother can register，Participate in the salon don't need to pay any costs。

　　为啥只针对单亲妈妈？

Why only for single mothers？

　　刘磊说，相对于单亲爸爸，单亲妈妈承受的压力更多，也更需要援助，活动先从单亲妈妈做起，以后再根据情况进行调整。

LiuLei said，Compared with single father，Single mother bear more pressure，Also need more aid，Activities from single mother first start，Later adjusted according to the circumstances。