男友苍南毕业后工作不顺，辞职考研，考了两年仍榜上无名，可他说要坚持到底考上为止。而这几年的生活担子却全都压在苏蕊肩上，她觉得越来越吃力了，想接受相亲对象的追求，尽早结婚，可又觉得对不起男友。(文中人物均为化名)苏蕊剪着短发，化了淡妆，很利索能干的样子。寒暄几句之后，她就开门见山地讲了起来，噼里啪啦，仍旧很利索的样子，最后却感叹，“可是，一遇到感情这事，我就利索不起来了，很纠结。”

Cangnan boyfriend after graduation rather work,Resign one's deceased father grind,Test for two years still fail in an examination,But he said must adhere to in the end admitted to so far.And the years of life burden but all pressure in suri shoulders,She felt more and more hard,Want to accept the pursuit of blind date,Married as soon as possible,And that I'm sorry boyfriend.(The characters are alias)Suri cut the hair,Changed depends,Very agile efficient way.After greeting, a few words,She come straight to the point to speak up,villager,Still very agile appearance,The last but sigh,"but,Encounter a feeling it,I'll agile don't get up,Very ravel."

　　不如意的生活改变了他 Not equal to idea of life has changed him

　　我不想等下去了 I don't want to wait

　　我学的广告专业，也换过几次工作，后来一心做策划。而苍南则从关山换到汉口的公司，后来又去了江夏一阵子，都没干长。他固执有野心，说想早点赚够一千万，要买房买车过好日子。我说不在乎，只要我们处得好，哪怕跟着母亲住旧房，我都乐意。

I learn professional advertising,Also in several times,Then do planning with all my heart.And the size of cangnan from change to hankou company,Then went to jiangxia for a while,Didn't dry long.He is stubborn ambitious,Said he wants to earn enough to early ten million,Want to buy a car for good.I said don't care,As long as we get along well,Even with his mother live old house,I'd be happy to.

　　一年后，他辞职了，开始了考研之路。他的专业考出来，确实能上一个台阶，他有个师兄就是如此，现在年终奖都在20万以上。他很动心，“拼搏几年，以后日进斗金，何乐而不为？”他既认真奔前程，我当然支持。

A year later,He resigned,Started one's deceased father grind road.His professional test out,Can really on a higher level,He has a brother is so,Now award in 200000 above.He was very excited,"Hard work a few years,Later make,What is there against it?"He is seriously rush future,Of course I support.

　　为了让他安心考研，且我也想上班近一点，就在离公司不远的地方租了个单间，每月七百元。买菜做饭洗衣扫地等，我基本都包了，从手足无措到能做出一桌饭菜，手被切了好几次，即便被母亲看到贴着创可贴，也狡辩说是关门时不小心夹的。

In order to let him at ease one's deceased father grind,And I also want to work closer,In the place not far from the company to rent a room,Seven hundred yuan a month.Buy food cooking laundry sweep the floor, etc,I have the basic package,From the unprepared to can make a table of food,Hand was cut several times,Even if be mother see stick band-aid,Also chicanery, shut the door on careful clip.

　　第一次考试，他很有信心，分数也不错，谁料那年都考得不错，他报的学校没挤进去，调剂的专业又很差，他决定再考一年，还花了几千元报了冲刺班。可惜他那年再次名落孙山。而他一直没敢跟老家的父母说辞职在考研，过年时还买了些礼物给父母。都是我出的钱。

The first test,He is very confident,Score well,During that year did well,His report school didn't squeeze in,A professional and is very poor,He decided to take an examination of a year,Spent thousands of dollars for the final class.It's a pity that he was once again be nowhere.And he hasn't been to dare with their hometown parents said resigned in one's deceased father grind,On Chinese New Year also bought some gifts for my parents.All is me out of money.

　　这两年，他几乎都宅在屋里，跟外界几乎无来往，孤僻且敏感。有天买菜回来，我就抱怨了一句菜薹涨价了，他就硬说我是指桑骂槐。结果大吵一架，闹到差点分手。以前那个温和体贴的他，变得像个怨妇，和他在一起，我越来越压抑。而他心安理得地享受着我的付出和照顾，偶尔承诺一下未来的回报。我只能苦笑。

The two years,He's almost home in the house,With the outside world almost no dealings,Withdrawn and sensitive.One day buy vegetables come back,I will complain about a extraction markup,He is that I speak at.The results have a big fight,Make to almost break up.Before the gentle considerate he,Become like a hatred fu,With him,I am becoming more and more depressed.And he feel at ease to enjoy my pay and take care of,Occasionally a commitment to the future returns.I can only smile bitterly.

　　去年和他商量，先找份工作再说，免得和社会脱节，影响心态。他坚决不同意，说不信考不上。

Last year to discuss with him,To find a job again,Lest and social disrupted,Influence mentality.He strongly disagreed,Say not letter I failed.

　　以前我们提过好几次结婚的事，后来母亲知道了我们的情况，却开始反对，“他和你同年，你花个十年八年把他培养出来了，你也成黄脸婆了，还有啥优势？而且他若混好了，说不定就看不上你了。”我口头说苍南不是那样的人，可心里同样担心。

We mentioned several times before marriage,Then his mother know our situation,But start against,"He and you in the same year,You spend a decade eight years of cultivating him out,You also into the yellow face shiva,And what advantage?And if he mix well,Maybe he despises you."I spoken cangnan not that man,But I'm also worried about.

　　以前我都坦诚地跟同事介绍这是男友某某，去年换到现在的公司，我就没带他参加过集体活动了，他本也不甚热心。同事大姐以为我单身，夸我朴实，从不打扮得花里胡哨，三个月前就给我介绍了韩群。于是矛盾心情里，我和韩群见了面，但下不了决心和他正式开始，只说自己慢热，先多花点时间互相了解。他说他也是这么想，就先从朋友做起吧。可我心里却充满罪恶感，觉得背叛了苍南，又欺骗了韩群。韩群越来越希望我能表态，而我却无法对苍南说出真相。

I used to have open with colleagues introduced this is her boyfriend so and so,Last year in the company until now,I haven't brought him in collective activity,He is also not very enthusiastic.Colleagues elder sister think I'm single,Kua I simple,Never dress up to gaudy,Three months ago introducing me to HanQun.So the contradictions in the mood,I HanQun and met,But not the determination and he formally began,Just a slow,To spend more time to know each other.He said he was thinking,First start from friends it.But my heart is full of guilt,Feel betrayed cangnan,And HanQun cheated.HanQun more and more hope I can declare,But I cannot cangnan to tell the truth.

　

　他再一次考研失利 He once again lost one's deceased father grind

　　月初，研究生考试下午就结束了，他早该回屋，却拖到晚上七点半才进门。一看脸色不好，我就猜到十有八九又考砸了。见他心情不好，就没提考试的事，只问他吃饭没，他不说话，倒床就睡。

early,Graduate student the afternoon is over,He had to go back to house,But until the night before at the door.A look at don't look well,I guess ten to one failed the exam again.See him in a bad mood,No mention of the exam,Just ask him eat didn't,He does not speak,Down bed sleep.

　　“真累了你就脱了鞋子好好睡，这像个么样子？”我话里还是带了些情绪。

"Really tired you to take off her shoes and a good sleep,This like a yao appearance?"My words or took some emotion.

　　他不理。

He ignored.

　　我又重复了一遍。

I repeated it.

　　他跳了起来：唠唠叨叨，你烦不烦？多管闲事！我爱咋睡咋睡，谁要你管？

He jumped up:clapper,You are too boring?assume!I love zha zha sleep sleep,Who will you tube?

　　“自己没考好，还怪别人？”我也气不顺。

"Himself didn't test good,Also blame others?"I also gas were.

　　他像个点了火的炮仗：“我就知道，你早瞧我不顺眼，是不？去呀，去找有钱有势的男人去。我就不信这辈子考不上……”

He like a point fire cracker:"I know,You had look I'm not pleasing to the eye,Is not?To ah,To find rich and powerful man to.I just don't believe in this life I failed……"

　　最后，气走的是我。他已考了两三年了，都是我养他，难道还养下去？我都这个年纪了，拖不起了。

finally,Gas go is my.He has got two or three years,Is all I have him,Don't have it?I all this age,Can't afford to drag the.

　　花钱总是很小心，想买件衣服吃顿大餐看场电影，都得盘算好几遍。他不上班，生活的担子都在我肩上，哪能随心所欲呢？房租、水电、买菜、交通、电话费，一样都不能少，节俭成了习惯。同样二十多岁的女孩子们，人家花枝招展，我却灰头土脸，不甘心却又无可奈何，他倒好，还一副落魄王子的姿态，怪我奉献得不够彻底。

Money is always very carefully,Want to buy clothes have a dinner a movie,Have to calculate several times.He didn't go to work,The burden of life is on my shoulders,How can follow one's inclinations??rent/hydropower/Buy vegetables/traffic/telephone,The same can't be little,Frugal habits become.Also more than twenty years old girls,The somebody else be gorgeously dressed,I was totally embarassed,But not voluntarily and helpless,He desires,Also a pair of down and out the prince's attitude,Blame I offer enough thoroughly.

　　闲晃了一会儿，我拨打了韩群的电话，他很惊喜，说还以为你不理我了呢。我半真半假地说你又没得罪我，干嘛不理你。扯了几句，他说请我消夜，我想了想推辞了，真的不知道如何面对他才好，自从上次他要抱我被我故意躲开后，大家都有些尴尬。他是同事介绍相亲的，彼此印象不错，但他也是个谨慎的人，两人就从网友开始做起，慢慢成为朋友。

Loiter about for a while,I dialed HanQun telephone,He was very surprise,Said thought you ignore me now.I half truth to say you have sinned against me,Why ignore you.Pull a few words,He said please I snack,I wanted to refuse the,Really don't know how to face he just good,Since the last time he want to hug me is I intentionally after away,Everyone some awkward.He was introduced to the colleagues,Each other good impression,But he is a careful person,Two people to start from the net friend,Slowly become friends.

　　最后我到大学同学那里住了一晚，聊了半夜，只是面临选择的事，没敢说。

Finally I went to university students there for one night,Chatted midnight,Just face the choice,Didn't dare to say.

　　

他曾经给我温暖 He used to give me warmth

　　我大二认识苍南，他是我高中同学的大学同学，大学同学之间流行串门子，后来就凑到一块了。那时我年纪小，要求也不高，两人一起吃个饭，逢节日他送个娃娃、几朵花啊，我就笑逐颜开了。不同校就不能每天见着，就避免了很多争执，再则，两人家境都一般，也不会去租房子同居，偶尔去开一次房，有段私密时间，就很开心了。

I know two cangnan,He is my high school classmate of university students,University students ChuanMenZi between popular,Then get a piece of the.When I was young,Request is not high also,Two people together to eat a rice,Every day he sent a doll/Some flowers ah,I will smile the.Different school can't see every day,To avoid a lot of dispute,moreover,When two people are generally,Also can't go to rent a house together,Occasionally go to open a room,A private time,Very happy.

　　大三下学期我家出了变故——父母终于还是离婚了。他们这几年关系都不好，离婚的话也背着我说过好多次。父亲已有新人，我选择跟母亲，父亲答应出学费，生活费母亲出，直到我大学毕业。

For my three out of the accident - finally divorced parents.They are not good relationship over the past few years,Divorce words carry I said many times.Father has new,I choose to mother,The father promised to tuition fees,Living mother out,Until I graduated from the university.

　　母亲在一个事业单位当合同工，收入明显没父亲高，虽然旧房给我们母女留下了，但母亲要养自己还养我，有些艰难。我去做兼职，不愿去向父亲伸手。苍南很心疼，有时就悄悄塞些钱到我包里，其实他也不怎么富裕。我有一阵在一个小吃店做兼职，晚上10点多才回去，他不放心就过来接我又送回学校，而后骑自行车到外租房的阔同学那里混一晚，太晚了学校宿舍已锁门，他也进不去了。后来不愿他太辛苦，我就辞掉了。那时候，生活苦但心里很甜。

Mother in a business unit when the contract,Income obviously didn't father high,Although the old house to us and left,But mother to raise oneself still have me,Some difficult.I am going to do a part-time job,Don't want to stretch out his hand to his father.Cangnan very distressed,Sometimes quietly plug some money to my bag,Actually he is not very rich.I have a part-time job in a snack bar,More than ten o 'clock at night to go back,He doesn't trust came to pick me up and sent back to school,And then ride a bike to rent a house outside the rich students there mix one night,It's too late to school dormitory have to lock the door,He also into not to go.Then don't let him too hard,I will quit the.At that time,Life bitter but in the heart is very sweet.

　　

[记者手记] [reporter hand]

　　爱一个人，是不管他是成功还是失败，是不管世人眼睛怎么看待他，你都仍旧愿意站在他身边，彼此扶持，必要时做他的拐杖，即便物质上不丰足，也心平气和岁月静好感情融洽。但能这样做的人，不仅得有强大的内心，更要有相当的生活能力，对自己的生活负责，还能承担可能的后果，比如他可能还得三年五年才能考上，也可能就是考不上，未来就是未知数，你能接受吗？如果你不是那样强大的人，那就坦诚一点吧，向他说出你的顾虑，寻找改善的途径。感情，也需量力而行，好比考试，考不到满分，不是罪，但作弊就不对了。

Love a person,Is whether he succeed or fail,No matter how the world is eyes look at him,You are still willing to stand by his side,Support each other,When necessary to do his crutches,Even if the material not fullness,Also calm years static good feelings harmony.But can do,Not only have a strong heart,More to have a life ability,To own life is responsible for,Also can take on possible consequences,Such as he may have to three years five years to enter,Also may be I failed,The future is unknown,Can you accept it?If you are not that strong man,Then open a bit,To tell your concerns,Looking for ways to improve.feelings,Also need to follow the,Like test,Test less than full marks,Sin is not,But cheating is wrong.