老是认为自己“不好”的人容易把同胞间没有恶意的话解读成针对自己

Always think you"bad"People can not malicious words between compatriots to interpret for yourself

　　小时候，由于父母的偏心、彼此的竞争和矛盾，令兄弟姐妹相互嫉妒。很多人以为“一世人两兄弟”，长大以后懂事了，同胞之间就和好了。然而心理学家不以为然，认为在消极信念作用下，同胞之间并无恶意的话很容易被误解，建议用认知行为技术对嫉妒心进行处理。

When I was a child,Due to the eccentricity of the parents/Each other's competition and conflict,Make brothers and sisters mutual envy.Many people think"The two brothers",Grow up wiser,Between compatriots made.However, some psychologists to disagree,Think in under the action of negative beliefs,Siblings and no malicious words very easy to be misunderstood,Suggest using cognitive behavioral technology to jealousy for processing.

　　嫉妒，是一种愤怒而激动的焦虑状态。对于同胞而言，嫉妒就是害怕同胞的成功会令我们自己的成就相形见绌，甚至害怕同胞会做出某些伤害我们的行为。嫉妒心会让我们过分担心来自同胞的威胁。他们没有恶意的简单举动很容易被误以为是人身攻击。例如，姐姐问弟弟：“你的新工作干得怎样？”弟弟会把这个问题解读成“你刚被炒鱿鱼，这次又能够干多久？我做同一份工作已经好多年，现在准备升职。”

envy,Is a kind of anger and excited anxiety state.For compatriots in,Jealousy is afraid of compatriots success will make our own achievements to shame,Even afraid of compatriots will make some damage our behavior.Jealousy will let us worry too much about the threat from compatriots.They have no malicious simple act can easily be mistaken for a personal attack.Such as,Sister asked brother:"Your new job?"Brother will put this question to interpret"You just got fired,How long do you can again this time?I have been doing the same job for many years,Are now ready to promotion."

　　美国库茨敦大学心理学副教授阿维丹·米列夫斯基认为这是过度敏感，通常是对自己消极的核心信念所致总是认为“我不好”的人更容易误读同胞不带恶意的话。同胞之间的嫉妒十分常见，他认为不能忽视其存在，建议用两个经典的认知行为技术处理，称这是证实有效能减轻嫉妒心的方法

The United States library, an associate professor of psychology at the university of Kingston efficiency.the Dan m levski think this is too sensitive,Usually is the negative core belief always think that caused by"I am not"Are more likely to misread compatriots without malicious words.Siblings jealousy is very common,He thinks that cannot ignore its existence,Suggest using two classic cognitive behavioral technology processing,Say this is confirmed effective can reduce the method of jealousy

　　首先，问问自己，你的嫉妒心对自己有好处还是坏处？嫉妒能改善你的生活吗？令你和家人的关系变得更好吗？能让你工作更努力吗？如果你发现对同胞的嫉妒会让你过得更好，那么就没有必要担心了。在另一方面，如果你的嫉妒没有好处，只会让你焦虑，让你不断想着兄弟姐妹们混得如何好，自己过得如何坏，嫉妒只会增加你的痛苦。

First of all,Ask yourself,Your jealousy to own good or bad?Jealousy can improve your life?Make your relationship with your family become better?Can let you to work harder?If you find to compatriots jealousy will make you better,Then there is no need to worry about it.On the other hand,If your jealousy is not good,Will only make you anxiety,Let you constantly thinking about your brothers and sisters how mix,His how bad,Jealousy will only add to your pain.

　　嫉妒心常常被你对别人的消极行为增强。很多人以为，发泄对同胞的不满会宣泄我们内心的嫉妒。然而，这些消极的行为只会增强嫉妒心。尝试为同胞做积极的事情，例如主动联系他们，多和他们聚会，有空约出来喝茶等，很快你便会发现自己很享受与他们在一起，他们对你也完全不构成威胁。（编译 伍君仪）

Jealousy is often you to other people's negative behavior increase.Many people think,Will the disaffection of compatriots to give vent to anger we heart envy.however,These negative behavior will only strengthen jealousy.Try to do something positive for compatriots,Such as active contact with them,And they party,Free out about tea, etc,Soon you will find himself very enjoy with them,They also to you is not a threat.(Compile WuJunYi)