scar

　　整个初中，暖暖的学习成绩都排在全班前五，时常会拿个第一。初三时，为了能留在北京，暖暖决定报考民大附，这样，即使户籍不放开，她在民大附也可以参加北京的高考。

The junior high school,Warm study result finished in the top five of the class,Often take a first.High school,In order to stay in Beijing,Warm decided to enter oneself for an examination the attached,this,Even if the household register don't release,She in people with big can also attend the university entrance exam of Beijing.

　　可民大附面对全国招生，每个省只有10多个学生能考上，一直在北京学习的女儿，将和全国各地的少数民族孩子竞争这个名额。

But people with big with the recruitment of students,Every province only more than 10 students can take an examination of,Have been in Beijing, the daughter of learning,Will all over the country and the minority children competition the quota.

　　暖暖告诉父母：“我一定要考上民大附。”之后她会补上一句：“您千万别把我送回去。”

Warm told his parents:"I must take an examination of people with big."Then she will catch up on a:"You don't send me back."

　　她拼命地学习，还报了新东方的中考补习班，据说这里“往往可以将中考成绩提高一两百分”。这一年，教育花销有3万多，占了家庭支出的一半，一家三口再没去过商场买新衣服。

She desperately learning,Called the new Oriental tested the cram school,It is said that here"Often can will tests the result to improve a couple of percentage".This year,Education costs more than 30000,Accounted for half of the family expenses,A family of three haven't been to market to buy new clothes.

　　“孩子在北京学习了这么多年，不这样，怎么能考过那些从小接受应试教育的外地孩子？”崔莹描述着当时的想法。

"Children learn in Beijing for so many years,Don't,How can you pass the exam education from accept the foreign child?"CuiYing describe the idea at that time.

　　暖暖每天晚上除了完成学校里的作业，还要将补课班的语文、英语、数学等作业写完。每天晚上九点多到家后，要继续熬到一两点钟。她开始不停地喝咖啡，晚上喝，白天去学校同样带上三四袋儿。有时候，早晨醒来的崔莹会发现，孩子趴在书桌上睡着了。

Warm every evening in addition to finish school assignments,And he will BuKeBan language/English/Math homework done.Every day more than 9 o 'clock in the evening after home,Will continue to endure to a two o 'clock.She began to constantly drinking coffee,Evening drink,The day go to school also take three or four bag son.sometimes,Wake up in the morning CuiYing will find,The child fell asleep over the desk.

　　不久之后，这个压抑的家庭在沉默中爆发了。

Shortly after,The depressive family broke out in silence.

　　中考前夕，因为嫌父母唠叨学习问题，暖暖少有地任性了一次，把自己锁在了屋子里。丈夫的倔脾气上来了，一脚踹开了门。“结果，孩子离家出走了。”崔莹闭上了眼睛。

Tests eve,Because too parents nag learning problems,Warm rare a capricious,Lock yourself in the room.Her husband's stubborn temper came up,A feet chuai opened the door."The results,The children ran away from home."CuiYing closed his eyes.

　　夫妻俩冒着大雨找了两个小时。半夜的时候，才在另一个单元漆黑的楼道里，发现了窝在角落里的女儿——她光着的脚丫上沾满泥巴，浑身湿透了，抱着膝盖抽泣着。

A couple in the heavy rain for two hours.In the middle of the night,Just in another unit in the dark corridor,Find the nest in the corner of her -- she bare feet on the become very muddy,Sopping wet,Holding the knee sobbing.

　　“我们真的不该给她这么大压力。”说到这儿，她摇了摇头。

"We really should give her such a big pressure."Said here,She shook his head.

　　没过多久，父女俩又吵起来了。父亲发现暖暖的小臂上红肿地刻上了一行字母“MDF”，以为孩子早恋，刻的是男孩的名字，父亲劈头盖脸责骂暖暖。

It wasn't long before,Both father and noisy up.Father found in warm forearm red to engrave a row of letters"MDF",Think the child to early love,Cutting is the name of the boy,Father scolded swept over warm.

　　崔莹劝开了丈夫，坐在女儿身边询问：“无论什么情况，妈妈都不怪你。”女儿哇的一声哭了：“妈妈，那是民大附的简称，我为了努力学习自己刻的。”

CuiYing advised opened her husband,Sitting beside his daughter asked:"No matter what situation,Mother don't blame you."Daughter wow a loud cry:"mother,That is the big people attached referred to as,I to study hard at his present."

　　崔莹至今记着那伤口的模样：孩子肉呼呼的手臂上，扎着密麻麻的点状伤口，青一块红一块。伤口很深，有些地方还没结成痂。

CuiYing now remember that the appearance of the wound:Children shout meat on his arm,Firm MiMaMa point wound,Black and blue piece of red a block.Wound is deep,Some places haven't form scab.

　　“我都不敢问她是用什么扎的，扎在了我的心上啊。”崔莹嚎啕大哭，“孩子是我的一块肉，当时才14岁啊，她得多疼啊！”

"I dare not ask her what is firm,Bundle in my heart ah."CuiYing wail aloud to weep aloud,"The child is my a piece of meat,At that time were only 14 years old ah,She had many painful ah!"

　　暖暖最终没有考上民大附。她升入了自己初中所直属的高中，成绩排全班第六。

Which ultimately did not take an examination of people with big.She rose to his junior high school have directly under the high school,Ranked the sixth of the class.

　　得知录取结果的晚上，暖暖凌晨三点哭着摇醒了崔莹：“妈妈，您花了那么多钱，操了那么多心，我怎么连普通孩子都不如呢？”

That evening admitted results,Three in the morning which cry shake woke up CuiYing:"mother,You spent so much money,Operating so oversensitive,How do I even ordinary children are not?"

　　母女俩抱头痛哭。

Mother and daughter both women and wept bitterly.

　　初中时，班里的同学还有几个外地孩子，现在，暖暖成了全班唯一一个“外地生”。那些外地同学，要么中考前回到了老家准备考试，重新适应当地的教育环境，要么被有条件的家长安排到某些高中的国际班，等待高中毕业后直接出国。

Junior high school,His classmates have a few foreign children,now,Which class became the only one"Foreign born".Foreign students who,Before the mid-term exam or returned to their hometown to prepare for the exam,To adapt to the local education environment,Or be conditional parents arrange to some high school international class,After graduating from high school, wait for directly go abroad.

　　这两个选择是崔莹不愿接受的：“出国，那么小的女孩我怎么放心，再说，全程花费一两百万，哪里掏得起；回去，这些年从来没回过黑龙江，她会疯掉的。”

The two choice is CuiYing reluctant to accept:"Go abroad,So the little girl how do I trust,besides,The whole cost shares,Where to stump up;back,These years have never return heilongjiang,She will be crazy."

　　她们只能选择继续等待。

They can only choose to continue to wait.

　　经历一连串的挫折后，暖暖的成绩从高一开始一路下滑。到了期末的时候，排到了全班30多名。没了方向的她，越发消极了。

Through a series of setback after,Warm result from the higher began to all the way down.In the final time,Row to the class name more than 30.Didn't the direction of she,More negative the.

　　而她手臂上的伤，早就结成了触目惊心的疤。

And the wound on her arm,Would have formed a shocking scar.

　　

救救孩子 Help children

　　经过调整，女儿的成绩有了起色。

After adjustment,Her daughter's performance prosper.

　　崔莹不是没想过不赌了，今年3月份，她把暖暖送到老家，参加了当地学校的一次统考，可北京的教育和牡丹江完全不对接，暖暖成绩排名垫底。校方以影响升学率为由，拒绝接受暖暖。

CuiYing not thought not bet,In march this year,She put her warm to their hometown,To participate in the local school a unified examination,But Beijing's education and mudanjiang completely don't butt,Warm achievement at the bottom.The school in order to influence on the graduation rates,Refused to accept warm.

　　回到北京，暖暖在3个月后的期末考试中，考进了前10名。老师根据这次考试，给同学们排座位，前10名能坐到前两排，可暖暖仍然坐在原来的位置。

Back to Beijing,Warm in 3 months after the final exam,Pass into the top 10.The teacher according to the exam,Give students pew,Top 10 can sit on the first two row,Can warm still sitting in the original position.

　　暖暖去问询老师，老师当着所有人的面回答：“你是要回老家高考的，先照顾一下大家吧。”

Warm to information the teacher,The teacher in front of everyone answer:"You are back to the college entrance examination,To look after it."

　　晚上回家，情绪失控的女孩哭喊着，将桌子上的书本和文具都狠命地砸在了地上。

Go home at night,Emotion girl crying,Will table the books and stationery are all hit on the ground.

　　当晚11点，崔莹在网上发了一条微博：救救孩子吧！孩子放学回来到现在一直在哭、在喊！因为我们2013年参加高考，一直在等待异地高考政策，可是在哪里报名？苍天救救我的孩子！

11 o 'clock that night,CuiYing posted a a micro bo:Help children, don't you!Child come back from school to now have been crying/Shouting!Because our 2013 to participate in college entrance examination,Have been waiting for the college entrance examination different policy,But where sign up?Heaven help my child!

　　随后，那些评论“活埋了”她。

then,Those comments"Buried alive"she.

　　“您孩子几点放学的，一直哭到大半夜，没背过气儿去啊。”

"Some of your child from school,Cried to the big,Didn't have time to go back ah."

　　“麻利儿回老家！该干嘛干嘛去，别把您家孩子毁了。”

"Hemp the benefit son is back!The why and why go to,Don't put your children house destroyed."

　　“即使放开，北京也是最后，门槛最高，哪有你等的份呀。”

"Even if let go,Beijing is also the last,Highest threshold,Where have you wait a ah."

　　“这样的家长和大月份引产有何区别?怀孕之前就知道不符合规定，硬是坚持，等快生了，男孩就交罚款，女孩就引产骗取同情，还声讨人权。”

"Such parents and big months induced labor have why to distinguish?Before pregnancy will know that do not conform to the rules,Just insist on,Etc fast gave birth to,The boy will pay a fine,The girl is induced labor diddle sympathy,Also condemn human rights."

　　“如果为全国的孩子争取高考统一试卷，我支持。可是你们却想去争取北京、上海这些本身就是不平等高考政策的优惠名额，对其他孩子是不公平。”

"If the children for the college entrance examination examination paper unified,I support.But but you want to go to Beijing/Shanghai these itself is not equal the university entrance exam of preferential policy quota,For other children is not fair."

　　“这些高考移民利益集团多么可恶！”

"The college entrance examination immigration interest group how hateful!"

　　在1600多条回复里，这样的话语占了近六成。崔莹一条也没回复，一位网友评价：“这当妈的，心理素质过硬。”

In the more than 1600 in reply,Such discourse accounted for nearly sixty percent.CuiYing a also didn't reply,A net friend evaluation:"This when mama of,Psychological quality stands up to the most rigorous test."

　　“攻击、侮辱都不怕。”她说，“但不知道，自己还能不能扛到明年的高考。”

"attack/Insult all not afraid."She said,"But I don't know,You still can carry to next year's college entrance examination."

　　两年前，她因为内分泌紊乱，动过子宫手术。2012年5月份，因腹部持续不适，连续大出血，做了病理取样手术。大夫告诉她：已经病变，是癌症前期症状，建议尽早切除子宫。她怕影响女儿，瞒着病情，一直拖着。因为吃药，46岁的崔莹，脸庞总是浮肿着。

Two years ago,Her because the endocrine disorder,Moved uterine surgery.In May 2012,Because for abdominal discomfort,Continuous hemorrhage,Do the pathological sampling operation.The doctor told her:Have lesions,Is cancer early symptoms,Suggestions hysterectomy as soon as possible.She is afraid influence their daughter,From illness,drag.Because the medicine,46 years old CuiYing,The face is always dropsy.

　　暖暖也越来越逆反了。

Which also more and more negative the.

　　有一天，暑期补习班的老师打来电话，孩子没去上课。面对质问，暖暖扭头就要走。压抑已久的崔莹，把病情哭着告诉了女儿。暖暖跪下了，“我再也不犯错误了，妈妈你赶紧去医院吧。”

One day,Summer cram school teacher calls,The children didn't go to school.In the face of the query,Warm twist will go.'s pent-up CuiYing,The illness cried and told her daughter.Warm on his knees,"I won't make a mistake,Mother, do you go to a hospital it."

　　一边往医院跑，一边还要往教育部跑，崔莹曾经问过教育部门，像暖暖这样在北京上高中的外地孩子有多少，没人回答她。有研究这个问题的律师说，在北京，上高三的外地学生有4000多人，因为对政策松动越来越绝望，高一高二的人数低于这个数字。很多家长抱团取暖，这几年，崔莹在网上、生活中，或多或少接触过不下2000个和她一样忧心忡忡的父母，有十五六个家长和她一样，孩子已经上了高三。2011年11月17日，崔莹就作为家长代表之一，向教育部学生处处长反映异地子女高考的问题。

Side went to the hospital to run,As they ran to the ministry of education,CuiYing asked education department,Such as warm in Beijing to go to high school how many foreign children,No one answered her.Have studied this problem lawyer said,In Beijing,The foreign students in senior year more than 4000 people,Because of the policy loose more and more despair,A number of high below this figure.Many parents BaoTuan heating,Over the past few years,CuiYing online/life,More or less contact with no less than 2000 a and she worried parents,Have 15 parents and her,The child has been on the senior year.On November 17, 2011,As one of CuiYing parent,The ministry of education to inquire division chief reflect different children the problem of college entrance examination.

　　“今年孩子读高二的家长，一旦有了政策，我们会通知您。”这位领导回答道，“今年高三的，肯定没希望了。”一位家长听罢，直接瘫在了地上，被搀了出去。

"Children read this year high parents,As soon as the policy,We will inform you."The leader replied,"This year the high,Sure no hope."A parent who listen to,Direct paralysis in the ground,Was made with out.

　　2012年8月底，《关于做好进城务工人员随迁子女接受义务教育后在当地参加升学考试工作的意见》出台。随后，一位教育部领导在新闻发布会上，强调家长们符不符合标准，要看“这个城市发展需不需要这个行业，需不需要这个群体”。

At the end of August 2012,[The preparation for migrant workers SuiQian children receive compulsory education after the local attend school entrance examination opinions]issued.then,A ministry of education leadership in the press conference,Emphasize parents operator does not accord with a standard,To see"The city development need the industry,Need not to need to this group".

　　这并不是崔莹想看到的最终结果。

This is not CuiYing want to see the final results.

　　虽然高考还有200多天，可12月初就要填写高考志愿了，留给暖暖的，只有60天了。黑龙江老家当地的会考已经结束——这意味着，即使暖暖回去，肯定拿不到当地高中的毕业证。

Although the university entrance exam and more than 200 days,But in the early December will fill in the university entrance exam is volunteer,To warm,Only 60 days.Heilongjiang hometown local examination is over - this means,Even if warm back,Must take less than the local high school graduation certificate.

　　如果这60天没有任何转机，只有休学一年——等待北京的新政策出台。崔莹托朋友打听，休学证明必须因为身体因素，或成绩极差面临留级才能申请。不符合条件，没有医生敢开证明。

If this 60 days without any transfer,Only a year off - waiting for Beijing new policies."CuiYing friends to find out,Proof must be off because the body factor,Or poor performance face to repeat a year can apply for.Do not conform to the conditions,No doctor dare open proof.

　　“退一万步讲，我们等一年。”这位母亲狠狠揪着头发，“如果，明年政策还是没出台呢？”她不敢想。

"Speak out ten thousand steps,We wait a year."The mother was pulled her hair,"if,Next policy still didn't come??"She dare not want to.

　　这些纠结的事情，崔莹没敢跟女儿详细谈。8月底的摸底考试，暖暖拿了全班第一名，情绪刚刚稳定下来——“她再受不了任何刺激了”。

All these entanglements of things,CuiYing didn't dare to talk with his daughter detailed.The end of August novelty of the exam,Which took the class first,Emotional just stable --"She can't take much more of any stimulated".

　　暖暖17岁了，她剪掉了多年的长发——因为学习紧张，打理头发要花上不少时间。以前遇到不高兴的事情，她会把自己关在浴室里，将水龙头开到最大，戴着耳机在里面大声唱歌。今年开学以来，她没再唱过一句，只有拼命地学习。

Warm 17 years old,She cut away the years of long hair, because learning tension,Do the hair to spend a lot of time.Before meeting the not happy thing,She will lock yourself in the bathroom,Turn the tap the largest open,Wearing headphones in singing loudly.Since the start of this year,She didn't sing a,Only try very hard to learn.

　　前些天，她和母亲躺在床上聊到了凌晨3点多：我要找个好工作，努力赚钱，在北京市中心和香港分别给您买栋别墅……听到这儿，崔莹撩开她的小齐帘，亲了亲她的脑门。

The other,She and her mother lie on the bed to chat at 3 o 'clock:I want to find a good job,Efforts to earn money,In the center of Beijing and Hong Kong, you buy a villa……Hear here,CuiYing LiaoKai her richie curtain,, and kissed her on the forehead.

　　暖暖半开玩笑地问崔莹：“是不是我嫁给一个北京男孩，以后我的孩子，就可以在北京参加高考了？”

Warm half jokingly asked CuiYing:"Isn't me to marry a Beijing boy,After my children,Can in Beijing to attend the university entrance exam?"

　　(文中崔莹为化名)

(This paper CuiYing for alias)