拇指上的父爱 Father on the thumb

10万字短信陪儿子走过高中 100000 words message with his son through high school

　　郑银林的儿子从孝感市云梦县考入华中师大一附中读高中，他每天发手机短信与儿子交流。三年下来，短信有10万多字，内容包罗万象，既有文学典故，也有家长里短，还有天气预报等等。今秋，儿子考入对外经济贸易大学，他整理出部分短信发到了网上。他的“拇指上的父爱”感动了很多人。日前，记者采访了郑先生。记者 王文杰如今，很多父亲为了家庭、为了事业，全力在职场上打拼，无暇顾及孩子的教育。郑先生认为，一般来说，与母亲相比，父亲往往更理性、胸怀更宽广一些。因此，儿子出生后，他就和爱人分工：妻子负责后勤，他主抓儿子的教育。至于时间问题，他觉得如果你重视这个事情，就一定能找到时间。

ZhengYinLin son from central China normal university XiaoGanShi the yunmeng county was admitted to a school of high school,Every day he send SMS communication with son.Three years down,SMS has more than 100000 words,Content comprehensive,Both literary allusions,Also have small household affairs,And the weather forecast and so on.This autumn,Son was admitted to foreign economic and trade university,He sort out part of the message to send to online.his"Father on the thumb"Moved many people.a,The reporter interviewed zheng.Reporter the bidding was fast now,A lot of the father for the family/In order to cause,To fight in the workplace,Too busy to attend to children's education.Zheng think,Generally speaking,Compared with mother,Father tend to be more rational/Mind broader some.therefore,After the birth of his son,He and lover division of labor:The wife is responsible for the logistics,His son vice-governor of education.As for the question of time,He thought if you pay attention to this matter,We will be able to find time.

学前 驮着孩子满地爬 Preschool children carried the climb

　　“每个好学生的背后都有其独特的一面，我接触过一些华一学生，其中不乏天才型的，但大多数华一学生仍属地才型，就是说是培起来的，有社会培起来的，有家长培起来的，也有学生自己把自己培起来的，我孩子属于我这个家长一手培起来的”郑先生说。的确，此言不虚，因为，从儿子一出生，他就开始用心了。

"Every good student back has its unique side,I have been in touch with a few China a student,There is no lack of among them genius type,But most of our students are still apanage to type,Culture is to say it,A social culture up,Have parents culture up,Have the students themselves to their culture up,My children belong to me the parents hand culture up"Zheng said.indeed,This virtual,because,From a son was born,He began to the heart.

　　儿子出生的时候，看着嫩生生粉嘟嘟的小生命，郑先生觉得真是上天的恩赐，“要好好爱这个小生命”的情感油然而生。但究竟该怎样爱孩子？他进行了深度思考。“面对孩子，有的人是拿在手上怕飞了，含在口里怕化了，爱而过之；有的人心里很爱孩子，又怕孩子身上的奶腥味和臊臭味，爱而远之；有的人不会表达爱，以为打是亲骂是爱，就对孩子连打带骂，爱而害之。我认为，婴幼儿是有思想有情感需要的，他们口不能言手不会指，但对肌肤之亲表现得相当敏感和喜欢。他们闻到父母的体味儿听到父母的声音就显得兴奋，投入父母的怀抱就显得心安。小时候跟父母多多肌肤之亲的孩子，长大后跟父母的感情深厚一些。所以，在孩子稍大点儿时，我把他背抱扛驮，常嬉于家室内外。孩子特别喜欢跨在我背上骑马，我驮着他满地爬。一来增进了父子感情，二来锻炼了他的平衡能力。还有一点我注意过，大凡学习成绩好的孩子，孩子至少跟父母的一方关系特别融洽”。就这样，郑先生开始了做好父亲、和儿子一起成长的生活。

The son was born,Look at NenShengSheng powder doodle little lives,Zheng think this is the gift of god,"To love the little life"Emotion arises spontaneously.But what exactly how to love child?He carried out in-depth thinking."In the face of the children,Some people take in hand is afraid of flying,In the mouth with fear changed,Love and the;Some people in the heart very love children,And fear of children's milk smells fishy smell and SAO,Love far and the;Some people will not express love,Think dozen is close to scold is love,Even to the children play with scold,Love and pollution.I think,Baby is a thinking have emotional need,They say the mouth can't hand not means,But on the skin is kin quite sensitive and performance.They smell parents' body smell hear the voice of the parents is excited,Into the arms of parents is mind.When I was a child of the skin with their parents kiss child,Grow up heel his parents' feelings deep some.so,The child when some larger,I took him back hold carry carry,Often a home in indoor and outdoor.Children like span on my back riding,I carried him the climb.Enhance the father and son as feelings,2 will exercise his balance ability.One more thing I noticed,A study result good children,Children with their parents at least one side of the special relationship harmony".so,Zheng started to father/And son grow up together life.

　　在儿子学前阶段，郑先生主要是陪他“玩好”。“三五岁的孩子，应该充分尊重其天性玩！让孩子尽情地玩，看似毫无用处的玩，实际上有两大好处，一是锻炼身体，二是锻炼大脑。比如捉迷藏，一方面要快速奔跑，一方面要快速分析躲到哪里才不容易被发现。因为这个阶段，孩子只能掌握一些表象方面的知识，这些知识通过玩这种方式来获得是最好的。孩子在玩的时候，家长要“豁”得出去，就是不要怕脏。有的家长，孩子一接触大地就呵斥，那样孩子是干净了，可也缺少灵性了。一方面，有医学研究表明，正常分娩的孩子，体内有一种物质，能够抵御一般病菌的侵袭。另一方面，我个人认为，大地是一切生命之源，包括人！长期脚不沾地的人，会显得虚无。古希腊有个传说，当大地之子在空中与人搏斗得筋疲力尽时，只要他接触大地，他立即威力倍增。可见，大地给人的力量是无穷的。怕孩子脏的家长，解决的办法，就是丢下心里的包袱，放心地让孩子到地上摸爬滚打，然后勤洗手脸勤换衣服就行了。”郑先生说。

In the son preschool stage,Zheng mainly is with him"Playing well"."35 years old,Should fully respect the nature to play!Let the child to play,Seemingly useless to play,In fact there are two big advantage,One is to exercise,The second is to exercise the brain.Such as hide-and-seek,On the one hand to run fast,On the one hand to rapid analysis hide where don't easy to find.For this stage,Children can learn some knowledge of representation,These knowledge through the play this way to gain is the best.Children playing time,The parents should be"connected"Have to go out,Just don't afraid dirty.Some parents,A child contact the earth will hoot,That child is clean,But also the lack of spirituality.On the one hand,Have medical research shows that,Normal delivery children,The body has a material,Can withstand general bacteria invasion.On the other hand,Personally, I think,The earth is the source of all life,Including people!Long-term touched not land,Will look nothing.The ancient Greek have a legend,When the son of the earth in the air and people struggle when exhausted,As long as he contact the earth,He immediately power multiplication.visible,The earth gives person's power is infinite.Afraid of children dirty parents,solution,Left is the heart of baggage,Rest assured to let their children to the ground me.but,And then to wash their hands often face often change clothes line."Zheng said.

　　对于一些家长认为的一些“有用的”知识，如拼音、识字、计算等，郑先生认为通过游戏、玩玩具等形式让孩子有个基本认识即可，不是这个时期的重点。

For some parents think some"useful"knowledge,Such as pinyin/literacy/Calculation, etc,Zheng think through the game/Toys and other forms let children have a basic understanding can,Is not the focus of this period.

小学 让儿子自己“挣”零花钱 Primary school let the son himself"earn"Pocket money

　　郑先生认为，小学阶段是孩子性格初步定型的关键时期，首先，要重视对孩子性格的培养，注意观察孩子和同学以及邻居、亲友中小伙伴交往，教给他善于为他人着想、爱护幼小，学会善良、宽容、负责；其次，要培养好的行为习惯。这一点需要父母用点智慧和耐心。郑先生讲了儿子要零花钱的故事。“儿子上小学没几天，开始天天缠着我要钱，要钱的理由是：某某同学一天花多少，某某同学爸爸妈妈给了，爷爷奶奶还要给。没办法，我就今天5角明天1元地对付了一学期。一年级下学期开始，我跟孩子商量：从这一学期起，零花钱不能再要，靠自己赚怎样？儿子问怎样赚？我说：每天做完作业后，写一篇日记，不会写的字就用拼音，日记由爸爸批改，日记的好坏分六个等次，‘好、很好、很很好’，‘较好、阅、差’。如果日记得了个‘好’，得5角钱，‘很好’1块钱，‘很很好’1块5角钱，‘较好、阅、差’就没有钱，也不罚。如果再跟爷爷奶奶要钱的话，要一罚二。孩子同意了。”于是，郑先生成了儿子的“日记”专业老师。“我每天端坐桌前，改错别字，改标点符号，改不通顺的句子，然后写评语，再给等次。有时我手里没零钱，孩子就写张欠条：爸爸欠我一个‘好’钱。有时我多给了钱，也写张条子给他：儿子欠我一个‘好’。有时一连几天等次在‘好’以下，我改日记的时候，孩子就急了：为了我的财富，求求你，求求你，给一个‘好’吧！我适时地给他一个‘好’，并在当天的评语中写着：今天的‘好’是勉强给你的，今后你再求我也没有用，批改的权力在我，写得好不好的权力在你，请相信我是公平的。”就这样，儿子改掉了要零花钱的毛病，也养成了记日记的习惯。郑先生认为，小学阶段的孩子充满 了对外部世界的好奇，求知欲望强，家长要把握这一特点，利用“司空见惯”法来学习。儿子小学时，他家里有一黑一白两块板子，一个放在客厅，一个放在书房。一块把孩子记不牢的字注音组词写在上面，让他天天顺便看一下，增加感性认识，另一块把一些天文地理历史等知识写在上面，估计儿子不懂的先跟他讲一次再写。比如黑板上写着英语单词，白板上写着回文对联“仙居阁内阁居仙，月映湖中湖映月”。“这就是司空见惯法，效果很好。孩子后来的知识面较广，应该与两块板子有很大关系。”郑先生说。“小学阶段，每学期翻来覆去地就语文数学两本书，你的孩子会，别的孩子也会。要想初中以后在学习方面表现突出，必须在小学时用孩子易于接受的方法，开拓其视野，多掌握一些课本以外的东西。”

Zheng think,Primary school children's character is the key period of preliminary finalize the design,First of all,We should attach importance to the cultivation of the children's character,Attention to the observation of children and students as well as neighbors/Friends and relatives small and medium-sized partner contacts,Teach him be good for others/Take good care of the young,Learn good/tolerance/Responsible for;secondly,To develop good behavior habits.This need parents use point wisdom and patience.Zheng told his son to the story of the pocket money."The son of a few days in elementary school,Beginning every day over me for money,Want money reason is:So-and-so classmate day spend how many,So-and-so classmate mom and dad gave,My grandparents have to.Can't,I will today 5 Angle tomorrow 1 yuan to deal with a semester.The spring semester of the first year began,I discuss with children:From this semester up,Pocket money won't be able to,Depend on oneself earn?The son asked how to earn?I said:After we finished our homework every day,Write a diary,Won't write word use pinyin,Diary by correcting the father,The stand or fall of diary six points after the order of melchizedek,‘good/Very good/Very good’,‘better/read/difference’.If got a diary‘good’,Five cents,‘Very good’1 yuan,‘Very good’A piece of 5 cents,‘better/read/difference’There is no money,Also don't punish.If you want money words with my grandparents,A penalty two.The children agreed."so,Zheng became the son"diary"Professional teachers."Every day I sit up table,Change wrong character,Change punctuation,Change not smooth sentence,Then write comments,Give order.Sometimes I don't have any change in his hand,Children will write a bill:Dad owes me a‘good’money.Sometimes I gave the money,Also write a note to him:Son owe me one‘good’.Sometimes for days in after the order of melchizedek‘good’The following,I've changed my diary,The child is nasty:For the sake of my wealth,Beg you,Beg you,Give a‘good’it!I duly to give him a‘good’,And on the day of the comments in writing:Today's‘good’Is forced to you,In the future you again and I also was not used,The power of the correct in me,Write very good power in you,Please believe me is fair."so,Son get rid of the pocket money problems,Also has developed the habit of keeping a diary.Zheng think,Primary school children of the outside world full of curiosity,Seeking knowledge desire strong,The parents want to hold this characteristic,use"commonplace"Method to study.Son elementary school,His house has one black and one white two bat,A put in sitting room,One on the study.A piece of the child can't remember the words prison phonetic group of words written on it,Let him see the way every day,Increase perceptual knowledge,Another piece of put some astronomical geography knowledge of history written in it,Estimate son don't understand to speak to him once to write.Such as written on the blackboard are English words,White board written palindromes couplet"Xianju cabinet cabinet in xian,Reflect on the lake lake reflecting the moon"."This is the common method,Effect is very good.The child later a wide range of knowledge,With two pieces of board should have very big concern."Zheng said."Primary school,Each semester toss and turn to Chinese mathematics two books,Your children will,Other children will also.If you want to study in junior high school after stands out,Must be used when in elementary school children tend to accept method,Exploit its vision,To learn some things outside textbooks."

中学10万字短信陪儿子走过高中 Middle school 100000 words message with his son through high school

　　初中的孩子课业开始紧张，时间也紧张，而且小学升初中还存在身份的衔接和知识的衔接，郑先生认为，这一时期，家长要注意帮孩子调节。

Junior high school children start their nervous,Time also nervous,Primary school and junior high school still exist/identity of the cohesion and knowledge of cohesion,Zheng think,This period,Parents should pay attention to help my child to adjust.

　　“我孩子入初中的第一次期中考试，是班级第四年级第二十五名。看到这个结果，其实我心里很冰凉，看得出孩子心里更冰凉。我说：‘全县的优秀学生集中到一起，你的名次就上不去，这很正常。不过你看，你跟你前面的同学，分数差距不大，而且你有几题不是不会做，而是粗心大意扣了分，这就给你留下了很大的进步空间。我们两人一起反思吧。’于是，我家书房的白板上写下了三排字：生活：整洁有序/学习：深入细致/目标：逐步赶上先进。接下来一个月后的初中八校联考，我孩子的成绩就是班一校二了。“我一直认为孩子成人的重要性大于成才，而成人的标志应该是健康、快乐。有人说，现在的中学生起得比鸡早，睡得比狗晚，干得比牛多。的确，孩子上初中后，时间很紧，我担心孩子的身体受不了，就在每个星期六或星期天抽半天时间，跟孩子一起去锻炼跑步，或骑车到郊外远行。我建议家长主动负起责任来，找点时间，找点空闲，带着孩子，到户外走走。”与一般家长只抓孩子的学习成绩不同，郑先生也重视孩子的身心健康发展。

"My child into junior middle school first mid-term exam,Is the fourth grade class name 25.See the results,In fact my in the mind be very cold,See children more cold heart.I said:‘The county's outstanding student together,You cannot place,It's normal.But you see,With your classmate in front of you,Fraction gaps,And you have a few questions not won't do,But careless buckle the points,This will give you left a great progress space.We two people together to reflect on it.’so,My house of the study on the white board wrote three composing:life:Neat and orderly/learning:Deep and detailed/target:Gradually catch up with the advanced.Then after a month of junior high school eight school entrance exam,My child's achievement is a school the class two."I've always thought the child the importance of a greater than adults,And the sign of adult should be health/happy.Some say,Now the middle school students got up earlier than chicken,Sleep later than a dog,Do better than cow more.indeed,Children after junior high school,Time is very tight,I'm worried about the child's body can't stand,In every Saturday or Sunday smoke half a day,With your child to exercise running,Or ride a bike to the countryside trips.I suggest parents active responsibility,Looking for some time,Find some free,Took the children,To outdoor walk."And general parents just grab the child's study result different,Zheng also pay attention to the child's physical and mental health development.

　　2009年5月，儿子参加了华师一附中的专县生考试，近5：1的录取比例，他考上了！郑先生很激动，但也很纠结：到底读不读华师一附中？因为读，要交两万多学费！是笔不小的支出。不读，又心有不甘。“有天晚上，我在洗漱，孩子蛰到洗漱间门口，怯怯地用几乎听不见的声音跟我说他还是想读华师一附中。我突然觉得自己很无能，人家那么多有钱人的孩子想读考不取，我孩子考取了还在盘算钱的问题，一个决定就在这时突然下了，我压抑着哽咽对孩子说：‘这么多年来，依靠你自己的勤奋努力，终于取得了一个好的结果，我们也为此自豪。你想读就读吧，不要你操心钱的问题，爸爸妈妈的收入支持你读个高中还是没有问题的。’就这样孩子上了华师一附中。“刚到华一，我有事就跟孩子打电话。有一次孩子说，再有事就发短信吧，打电话很费时间，学校也管得很严的。于是我跟孩子约定：每周六晚上10点以后打一次电话，其余每天发短信。至于短信的内容，起初我侧重于跟孩子交流学习，有次孩子说，你再发短信就多聊点生活吧，特别是家里的生活，我看着就亲切。我想也是，就多加了些生活内容，让孩子感受到家的温暖。我平时半个月左右来武汉看他一次。高三时，奶奶来武汉陪读了1年。就这样，儿子顺利度过高中三年。”郑先生说。

In May 2009,Son attended the no.1 in the attached special county life test,Nearly five:1 admit proportion,He admitted to the!Zheng very excited,But also very ravel:What read don't read the no1 middle school?Because read,To deliver more than twenty thousand tuition!Be a big spending.Don't read,And heart are unwilling."One evening,I wash,Its children to XiShuJian the door,Timidly with almost inaudible voice told me that he wanted to read the no1 middle school.I suddenly feel very incompetent,The somebody else so many rich children want to read exam did not take,My children are eligible for the still calculate the problem of money,A decision when suddenly the,I suppress the SOB to the child:‘So for many years,Rely on your own hard work,Finally achieved a good result,We are proud of.You want to read it in,Don't you worry about the problem of money,Mom and dad income support you read a high school or no problem.’So the child in the school of no.1."Just to China a,I have something like children make a phone call.Once the boy said,Then something can send SMS it,Make a phone call is very time-consuming,The school also tube very tightly.So I agreed with children:Every Saturday night after 10 hit a telephone,The rest of the text every day.As for the content of the text messages,At first I focus on the exchange of learning with children,Once the boy said,You send a text message again much chat about life here,Especially the life at home,I look at the benignity.I would like to also,Just add some life content,Let children feel the warmth of home.I usually half a month to wuhan see him once.In senior 3,Grandma to wuhan or relatives can apply for 1 year.so,Son smoothly through high school three years."Zheng said.

　　郑先生和妻子分别是公务员和护士，收入不高，孩子读高中这3年花费不小，他们毫不心疼。生活上很节俭。两个大人从来不穿贵衣服。孩子的衣服极少有超过100块钱一件的。全家人的鞋子没有超过100块钱一双的。

Zheng and his wife were civil servants and nurse,Income is not high,The child read high school three years expe ive,They don't love.Life is very economical.Two adults never wear expensive clothes.The child's clothes rarely have more than 100 dollars one.The whole family shoes no more than 100 yuan a pair of.