期末考试结束后，初一学生小毅因害怕成绩太差被家长惩罚，一直不敢回家，在网吧里待了4天4夜，家长费尽周折才找到他。上网成瘾的少年与满心焦急的家长之间需要怎样的沟通？心理专家说，重建与孩子的沟通平台，并不像想象的那么简单。

After the final exam,7th grade students small strive for fear of poor grades are parents punish,Has dared not go home,In the Internet bar for four days and nights,All parents struggle to find him.Internet addiction young and full of sweat between parents need to communicate?Psychological experts say,Reconstruction and children communication platform,Do not like to imagine so simple.

　　昨日早上，12岁的初一学生小毅(化名)终于和父母说了5天来的第一句话。1月24日期末考试结束后，他一直没敢回家。

Yesterday morning,12 students first small project(alias)Finally and parents said the five days of the first words.At the end of January 24 date after the test,He has been didn't dare to go home.

　　因为害怕成绩差被惩罚，小毅在同学家里借住一晚后，躲进了一家网吧。父亲周先生在成都簇桥附近的网吧苦寻5天，终于把儿子找了回来。但他说，他和妻子用了两年时间，却从未真正走进儿子的内心：“我感觉我们之间有道坎，我想和他掏心窝子，但就是迈不过那道坎。”

For fear of bad grades being punished,Small know-how in the classmates' home to lodge a night after,And hid in an Internet cafe.Father Mr Zhou in chengdu cluster near the bridge the Internet bar looking for 5 days,Finally the son to find back.But he said,He and his wife had spent two years,But never really into the son's heart:"I feel we have line between,I want to cut his tao,But is Wallace but the line."

　

　期末考试结束之后 儿子一直没有回家 After the final exam son hasn't been home

　　小毅出走的那天是星期四，学校考试最后一科下午4点结束。周先生和妻子做好晚饭，但一直没等到儿子回家。他们在家附近几条街找了一圈，没发现儿子的踪迹。

Run away little strive day is Thursday,School exams last section at 4 PM.Mr Zhou and his wife do dinner,But haven't wait until the son came home.They near his home in a few street looking for a ring,Not found traces of son.

　　“我们以为他是贪玩在外面上网，第二天早上就会回来。”25日夫妻俩又等了一上午，仍没有消息。周先生到学校一问老师才知道，前一天考试结束后，班级集中点名时小毅还在，后来是和同学一起离开的。

"We think he is naughty outside the Internet,The second day morning will come back."25 a couple and waited all morning,Still no news.Mr Zhou to school ask the teacher didn't know,After the end of the day before the exam,Class focus during the roll call in small project,Then is left with my classmates.

　　几经周折，周先生联系上了和儿子一起离开的同学。这位同学说，当天小毅是在他家里过的夜，但第二天一大早就走了，可能在附近网吧上网。

After several setbacks,Mr Zhou contacted together with the son of the students leave.The classmate say,The project is small in his home for the night,But the second day early in the morning and went away,May nearby surf the Internet in a cyber bar.

　　

父母遍寻网吧无果 儿子网上留言怕挨罚 Parents ransack Internet cafe fruit son online message afraid fined

　　在这位同学的指引下，周先生夫妇随后开始在簇桥附近的网吧里寻找儿子。“太难找了，那些开网吧的地方，我们平时根本找不到。”25日、26日，夫妻俩在网吧里找了两天，有些网吧开在2楼，位置很隐秘，网吧老板害怕检查，警惕性很高，周先生夫妇只能悄悄进去，挨个辨认。

In under the guidance of the students,Mr Zhou couple then began in the cluster near the bridge in the Internet bar looking for son."Too hard to find the,The open Internet cafe place,We usually can't find."25/26,A couple in the Internet bar looking for two days,Some Internet cafe open in 2 floor,Position very secret,Internet bar boss afraid of inspection,High vigilance,Mr Zhou couples to go in quietly,Round identify.

　　1月27日，正当周先生还在为儿子失踪着急时，老师通知他到学校领取小毅的考试成绩单。拿到成绩单后，周先生气得直摇头：“150分总分的科目，他最高的两科只考了90多分，其他的只考了60多分。”

On January 27,,As Mr Zhou is still a son missing worried,The teacher inform him to school to receive small project test report.Get transcript after,Mr Zhou gas straight shook his head:"Total score 150 points of the subject,He is the tallest of the two families only got 90 points,Other only got sixty points."

　　当天上午，同学在QQ上看到了小毅留下的信息：“我还在外面，怕挨罚。”留言的时间是当天清晨，周先生据此推断儿子应该还在网吧里。

In the morning,Students on the QQ see small project leave information:"I was on the outside,Afraid fined."Message of the day time is early in the morning,Mr Zhou son should be based on that in the Internet bar.

　

　通过QQ找回儿子 他已在网吧里待了4天 Through the QQ find his son that he has set up a file in the Internet bar for four days

　　儿子失踪的几天里，周先生夫妇的担心越来越重。1月28日，儿子失踪4天后，周先生的手机收到了一个陌生人的短信。这本是一条发错了的短信，却让周先生夫妇担心儿子被绑架了。29日早上，周先生赶往金花和簇桥两个派出所报警。

Son missing in a few days,Mr Zhou couple worry more and more heavy.1 month and day,Son missing for four days later,Mr Zhou phone received a stranger's message.This is a hair wrong message,But let Mr Zhou couple worry son was kidnapped.29 morning,Mr Zhou to gold flower and cluster bridge two police station alarm.

　　在民警提醒下，当天下午，周先生通过儿子的同学，在QQ上联系上了小毅。当天傍晚，夫妇俩终于在一家网吧里找到了儿子。此时，小毅已在网吧里待了四天四夜。

Police remind the next,In the afternoon,Mr Zhou through the son's classmates,On the QQ contact on the small project.Later in the afternoon,The couple finally in an Internet cafe to find his son.At this time,Small project already in the Internet bar for four days and four nights.

　　小毅回家后，一直不敢和父母说话，周先生也没多问。吃过晚饭后，周先生铺好被子，让儿子早早睡下了。

Small strive after coming home,Have been afraid to talk with my parents,Mr Zhou also did not ask more.After dinner,Mr Zhou spread good quilt,Let the son went to bed very early.

　

　父亲：和儿子交流很困难 father:And son communication is difficult

　　周先生和妻子几年前来到成都打工，当时小毅还小，在重庆老家跟着爷爷奶奶。夫妇俩没注意到，每年回家探亲，儿子和他们的交流越来越少。

Mr Zhou and his wife came to chengdu work a few years ago,When small project is small,Hometown in chongqing with grandpa's grandmother.The couple didn't notice,Every year go home to visit,Son and their communication less and less.

　　周先生说：“两年前我们把他接到成都，他经常出去上网。我们工作忙，也没时间管他。”看到儿子喜欢电脑，周先生专门给他买了一台。但有时交给儿子的午餐费几天就没了，后来一查，才知道儿子拿去上网了。

Mr Zhou said:"Two years ago we put him to chengdu,He often go out on the Internet.We work busy,Also does not have the time to tube he."See son like computers,Mr Zhou special bought him a table.But sometimes to the son's lunch a few days did not have,Then check,Just know son take to the Internet.

　　儿子上初一的这个学期，周先生好几次想和他“掏心窝子”，交流一下未来的打算，但小毅每次话都不多，“他只是听我说，我说完就完了。”

The first son of this term,Mr Zhou several times to and he"Tao tao",Discuss future plans,But there are not many words every time a small project,"He just listen to me,I went out."

　　因为几乎不用电脑，直到小毅失踪，周先生夫妇都不知儿子的QQ号。

Because almost don't have a computer,Until the small project missing,Mr Zhou couple don't know son's QQ number.

　　

儿子：网吧比在家里轻松 son:Internet cafes than at home easily

　　昨日，在父母追问下，小毅终于讲出了出走这些天的经历。“那天从同学家出来，我就去网吧了。我晓得你们在找我，我那时还想待在网吧里。”小毅说，他这次又没考好，知道回家可能被惩罚，不如在网吧放松一下。

yesterday,In the parents ask,Small project finally tell the flee these days of experience."From that day the students out of the house,I will go to the Internet cafe.I know that you are looking for me,I was also want to stay in the Internet bar."Small project said,This time he failed the exam again,Know home may be punished,As in the net cafe to relax.

　　小毅是向同学借钱去的网吧。在网吧里，他除了吃饭，就一直在网上游荡。尽管他也很想回家，但一想到成绩差父母会责骂，就下不了决心。

Small strive to borrow some money to students is the Internet bar.In the Internet bar,In addition to his dinner,I have been in the net gadabout.Although he is also very want to go home,But think of bad grades parents will scold,Is not determined.

　　“父母都很忙，很少和我说话交流，我更喜欢上网打游戏。”为了装点自己的QQ形象、增强游戏人物，小毅把大部分零花钱花在了购买虚拟游戏币上面。在他看来，在网吧比待在家里轻松得多。

"Parents are busy,Seldom talk with me communication,I prefer playing games on the Internet."In order to decorate his QQ image/Strengthen game characters,Small project put most of money spent on the purchase of virtual game currency above.In his view,In the net cafe than stay at home much more relaxed.

　　

专家说法：与孩子沟通应该学会倾听和理解 Experts said:Communication with your children should learn to listen and understand

　　成都市未成年人心理中心主任袁茵说，周先生夫妇和小毅之间明显缺乏沟通的渠道。小毅喜欢上网，而周先生夫妇对网络比较陌生，这就像没有共同话题的双方，很难谈得拢。周先生夫妇需要很长一段时间，通过日常的关心和交流，真正了解孩子的内心，重建家长与孩子间沟通的渠道。而另一方面，与孩子沟通，应该学会倾听和理解，不能一上来就讲大道理，这样孩子会很抵触，不愿说出内心的真实想法。

Chengdu minor psychological YuanYin, director of the center said,Mr Zhou couples and small project between apparent lack of communication channels.Small project likes surfing the Internet,And Mr Zhou couple to network is strange,It's like no common topic both sides,Hard to talk all.Mr Zhou couple needs the very long period of time,Through the daily care and communication,Really understand the child's heart,Reconstruction between parent and child communication channel.On the other hand,Communication with your children,Should learn to listen and understand,Can't come up to speak a great truth,So that the child will be very inconsistent,Don't want to speak out their true idea.

　　袁茵特别提醒，像小毅目前这种情况，需要专业的心理医生进行指导，在细节上把握与孩子沟通的方法。

YuanYin special remind,Like a small project for the current situation,Need professional psychological doctor for guidance,In detail, grasp the method of communication with your children.

　

　记者手记 Reporter notes

　　不要只是苛求父母 Don't just criticize parents

　　出走5天后，小毅终于回家了，但我们不知道他的心灵还有多久才能真正回家。

Five days away,Small project finally came home,But we don't know his mind how long can really go home.

　　其实，记者内心很理解小毅父母的处境。在高速运转的现代社会，每个人都要付出大量的精力去挣钱工作，适应高效率的社会生活。我们可能忽略了孩子们已经成为了“缺乏玩伴的一代”。

In fact,Reporter heart very little understanding innofidei parents situation.In the high-speed operation of the modern society,Everyone has to pay a lot of energy to work to earn money,To adapt to the high efficiency of social life.We may ignore the children has become"Lack of playmates generation".

　　也许在呼吁父母为孩子多留出一点时间的同时，社会也应该给予孩子们多一些关注，哪怕只是开辟一些专门的活动场所，或者提供一些课余的游戏活动。（华西都市报记者 肖翔）

Maybe in calling for parents to set aside some time for the child at the same time,The society should also give children more attention,Even if it's just open up some special activity places,Or provide some improvement of the game activities.(West China metropolis daily reporter XiaoXiang)